A holiday ditty based on the true story of a woman who disposed of her unwanted infant in a not-so-Christmassy way.
Song aired Dec. 8, 2003, as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.
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All content (c)2003 TotalTheater Productions.
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IT’S A STIFF
by David Lefkowitz (to the music of “Let it Snow”)
Oh, the weather outside is frozen, so a Brooklyn church was chosen
All bundled in a blanket and a rag
There’s a small baby corpse in a bag.
The mother didn’t want to have her
So now she’s a blue cadaver
And it stinks if you take a whiff
It’s a stiff, it’s a stiff, it’s a stiff.
All the congregants in the church
They try to sympathize with the mother
`cause maybe in nine more months,
She’ll make a lifeless brother.
`Cause she didn’t really have an option
`cept birth control, abortion or adoption
When you’re stuck with a useless tot,
Let it rot, let it rot, let it rot.
Well, it’s kinda hard feeling merry
When you’ve got a bag of bones to bury
There’s very little skin inside;
Mummified, mummified, mummified.
They’ll measure her casket size
While a sermon’s being written
And makeup will soon disguise
Fingers all black and frostbitten. (crack!)
Now the temperature may be frigid
Enough to make a newborn rigid
Too late to save the infant’s soul.
Dig a hole, dig a hole, dig a hole.
It was just the baby’s time to die.
Wonder why, wonder why, wonder why.
©2003 David Lefkowitz