A song celebrating the joys of relief.
Segment originally aired Nov. 4, 2004, as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.
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MAKIN’ POOPIES
by David Lefkowitz
Another seat, another bowl
Another log comes out my hole
It’s really pleasin’ when I’m a-squeezin’
And makin’ poopies.
I pull my shorts below my rump
I read the sports and take a dump
It’s brown and shiny straight from the hiney
That’s makin’ poopies.
Sometimes I sit for ages waiting so patiently.
Though my intestine rages, nuggets are all I see.
I eat some bran and have some juice
Run to the can and shake it loose
I wipe my tushie when it gets mooshy
From makin’ poopies.
My little rectum, it does the job
Be it a hot dog or just a blob
It’s such a passion to feel the splashin’
Of makin’ poopies.
I grit my teeth and hug my gut
while underneath I hear a “splut”
It always happens with all my crappin’s
I’m makin’ poopies.
One day my gut got swollen,
I chalked it up to gas.
But when I touched my colon,
Blood shot out of my ass.
Now I feel woe, and it’s a drag
`cause when I go, it’s in a bag
I miss the odors of all the floaters
When making poopies.
So listen here, I recommend
That once a year, check your rear end.
Just find a docto’ to do a procto
He’ll stick a finga up your gazinga
You’ll scream and yelp, but it may help
in makin’ poopies.
©2004 David Lefkowitz