The 41st Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired June 20, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.
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41.
The Coast Guard receives a call to intercept a fishing boat off the waters of Maine. When they reach the vessel, they see it’s a small, weatherbeaten craft, yet it’s piled high with Atlantic herring. On board are just a 14-year-old boy and his ancient grandfather.
“Why have you stopped us?” says the boy.
“Overfishing,” the Coast Guard captain says. “You’ve got more than five times the allowable limit for a single trawl.”
“I know,” says the boy. “It’s my grandpa. Once he starts pulling `em out of the ocean, he can’t stop. It’s a compulsion.”
“Well, I’ll just have a word with him,” replies the Captain. “Old man. Do you realize you’re overfishing in these waters?”
“What’s that?” says the grandfather.
“You’re fishing too much. It’s illegal.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t understand,” says the senior.
“I said, you can’t keep stockpiling like this!” shouts the captain.
The old man shrugs uncomprehendingly. The captain says to the boy, “What’s the matter with him? Is he deaf?”
“No,” says the boy, “just Hoard of Herring.”