Recently back from Dublin, Dave sings of his encounter with an Irish legend.
Segment originally aired March 16, 2003, as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.
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SEAMUS THE URINE MAN
(sung a cappella)
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
There’s a shop in Dublin town
You should stop and look around
You’ll find candy, toys, and smokes
And a gentle Irish bloke
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
Though he is a fine old soul
His bladder, he cannot control
So lift your nose and sniff the air
You’ll smell something mighty queer . . .
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
When old Seamus takes a whiz
He will whiz, wherever he is!
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
Seamus is a merry fellow
Splashing in his pool of yellow.
Never does he take a break
He’ll make and make and make and make and make and make
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
He’s guaranteed to amuse
Stand too close, he’ll soak your shoes!
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
When ol’ Seamus eats an egg
Yolk starts running down his leg
He don’t care for fame or money
Long as he’s all warm and runny
They call him “yellow fellow” (quite a stink!)
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
Best to back away a little
Else you’ll get a spray of piddle
He gets wetter than the Navy
Shooting out his penis gravy
(are you enjoying your meal?)
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
Every night he prays to Jesus
To renew his enuresis
He lies down to rest his head
And wakes up in a waterbed
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man.
Seamus the Urine Man, the Urine Urine Man.
(Fill`er up!)
©David Lefkowitz