Dave’s Gone By #519 (7/25/2015): JUST BE CROS

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Here is the 519th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, July 25, 2015. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with actress Kathryn Crosby. Plus: Inside Broadway, The Wretched Pun of Destiny (surgeon), Bob Dylan – Sooner & Later (Newport `65), Saturday Segues (Juliana/Jagger, Ray Jessel), Greeley Crimes & Old Times, My Sick Mind (Crosby).

Guests: actress Kathryn Crosby, Dave’s wife, Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce (Cosby/Crosby)
00:20:00 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES
00:53:30 DAVE GOES FURTHER IN (curling!, Long Johns)
01:03:30 SATURDAY SEGUE – Ray Jessel
01:24:00 Sponsors
01:32:30 INSIDE BROADWAY
01:55:30 Friends
02:05:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Kathryn Crosby
02:54:00 Weather
02:58:00 MY SICK MIND – Cosby
03:02:30 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (Newport `65)
03:25:00 THE WRETCHED PUN OF DESTINY #46 (surgeon)
03:27:00 SATURDAY SEGUE (Juliana/Jagger)
03:43:30 DAVE GOES OUT

July 25, 2015 Playlist: “Walking the Cow” (00:42:00; Daniel Johnston). “Cold Clear World” (01:06:30; Baker Street 1965 Broadway cast). “Whatever Happened to Melody” (01:09:00) & “The Things You Do” (01:16:00; Ray Jessel). “I’m Outta Here” (01:13:00; Maude Maggart & Ray Jessel). “Edelweiss” (01:52:00; The Sound of Music 1959 Broadway cast w/ Theodore Bikel). “(Opening) Our State Fair” (State Fair 1996 Broadway cast w/ John Davidson & Kathryn Crosby). “Dream” (02:20:30; Bing Crosby & Kathryn Crosby). “The Second Time Around” (02:33:30; Kathryn Crosby). “I’ll be Seeing You” “It’s Easy to Remember” (02:49:30) & “I’ll Be Seeing You” (03:46:00; Bing Crosby). “Maggie’s Farm” ({live Newport version}, 03:09:00), “It’s Takes a Man to Laugh, It takes a Train to Cry” ({alternate version}, 03:14:00) & “It’s All Over Now, Baby Blue” ({live, Rolling Thunder version} 03:18:00). “Not Fade Away” (03:30:30), “Faith in our Friends” (03:32:00) & “Dying Proof” (03:38:30; Juliana Hatfield). “Running Out of Luck” (03:25:30; Mick Jagger).

Kathryn Crosby
Ray Jessel
surgeon
Dylan at Newport, 1965
Mick Jagger
Juliana Hatfield
Cos

Dave’s Gone By Interview (7/25/2015): KATHRYN CROSBY & Rabbi Sol Solomon

Click above to listen (audio only).

Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews actress Kathryn Crosby.

Topics include: Bing Crosby, State Fair, Gary Crosby, Peter Lorre, Dean Martin & Jerry Lewis, Mickey Rooney.

Segment scheduled to air July 18, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

More information about Rabbi Sol Solomon: http://www.shalomdammit.com

Dave’s Gone By Interview (8/2/2015): LOUISE HARRISON & Rabbi Sol Solomon

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Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews author Louise Harrison

Topics include: George Harrison, The Beatles, Brian Epstein, “My Kid Brother’s Band”.

Segment aired Aug. 2, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

More information about Rabbi Sol Solomon: http://www.shalomdammit.com

Dave’s Gone By Wretched Pun of Destiny #046: SURGEON

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The 46th Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired July 25, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.
More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

*
46.
A surgeon is being considered for a major position at a hospital. He tells the board his specialty is curing various forms of hepatitis.

“How do you do it?” they ask.

“I have two methods,” the doctor says. “If the disease hasn’t spread much, I open the patient up, and I use a piece of volcanic rock to sand down parts of the liver, while leaving the healthy tissue to heal.”

“Sounds fascinating,” says the board. “But what about when the organ is unsalvageable?”

“Then I operate,” the doctor replies, “but in a much less invasive way than usual because I make a tiny incision and pull the liver out through the belly button, reducing both scarring and healing time.”

Excited by these explanations, the hospital board puts the surgeon to the test. Over a grueling day, they have him see six patients, three with liver inflammation, three with full-blown hep.

As he described, the doctor uses lava rock on the first three people, and his special surgery on the rest. The next morning, all six patients are x-rayed, with the board members gauging the results.

Alas for the surgeon, he proves only half successful. The first three patients look fine, with their abraded organs already starting to reconstitute. But the sicker patients are a shock:

although the surgeon said he took their livers out, the x-rays show conclusively that the organs are still there, in their bodies.

“I’m sorry,” says the board, “you did fine with the sanding down, but your surgical procedure doesn’t work at all.”

“You mean, I don’t get the job?” sighs the surgeon.

“Of course not,” says the board. “You Pumiced, But you couldn’t De-Liver.”

Dave’s Gone By #518 (7/18/2015): NIP N’ TUCK

Click above to listen to the episode (audio only).

Here is the 518th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, July 18, 2015. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with film producers Sue & Lloyd Ecker. Plus: Inside Broadway, The Wretched Pun of Destiny (Picnic), Bob Dylan – Sooner & Later (Red Hot Mama), Saturday Segues (Sudden/Dalton, In the News), Greeley Crimes & Old Times

Host: Dave Lefkowitz

Guests: Film producers Sue & Lloyd Ecker (“The Outrageous Sophie Tucker”), Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce (mic covers, the gym, indiegogo, sherpes)
00:39:30 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES
01:18:00 DAVE GOES FURTHER IN w/ Joyce (Whitesboro, infrastructure)
01:30:30 SATURDAY SEGUE (Sudden/Dalton)
01:58:30 INSIDE BROADWAY
02:26:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Sue & Lloyd Ecker
03:35:00 Friends
03:45:00 The Wretched Pun of Destiny (picnic)
03:46:30 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (red hot mama)
04:14:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – In the News
04:39:00 Old Jokes w/ Joyce
04:48:00 DAVE GOES OUT

July 18, 2015 Playlist: “Before I Die” (01:36:00), “The Rolling of the Hearse” (01:43:30) & “The Only Boy in Heaven” (01:50:00; Nikki Sudden). “Something on Your Mind” (01:40:30) & “I Love You More Than Words Can Say” (01:46:30; Karen Dalton). “Finale Ultimo” (On the Twentieth Century 2015 Bway cast). “No One But the Right Man” (02:24:30), “There’s No Business Like that Certain Business” (02:55:30), “My Yiddishe Momme” (03:17:30) & “Some of These Days” (04:58:30; Sophie Tucker). Promo for “The Outrageous Sophie Tucker” (02:42:00). “Last Night” (03:48:00; The Traveling Wilburys). “The Walls of Red Wing” (03:52:00), “Day of the Locusts” (03:57:00) & “Shake Shake Mama” (04:00:30; Bob Dylan). “Nukular” (04:04:30; Jay Leonhart). “Great Escape” (04:14:30; Moby). “Aurora” (04:16:30). “Ant Man Bee” (04:21:30; Captain Beefheart). “The Good Son” (04:24:00; Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds). “There’s No Love in Tennessee” (04:30:00; Barbara Mandrell).

Sue & Lloyd Ecker
Karen Dalton
Nikki Sudden
picnic

Dave’s Gone By Interview (7/18/2015) SUE & LLOYD ECKER & Rabbi Sol Solomon

Click above to listen (audio only).

Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews producers Sue & Lloyd Ecker about their documentary, “The Outrageous Sophie Tucker.”

Topics include: Sophie Tucker, business, filmmaking.

Segment scheduled to air July 18, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

More information about Rabbi Sol Solomon: http://www.shalomdammit.com

Dave’s Gone By Wretched Pun of Destiny #045: PICNIC

Click above to listen.

The 45th Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired July 18, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.
More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

*
45.
Scandal erupted at this year’s town picnic when a two-man team was caught cheating during the three-legged race. It seemed the runners, who won the race, used an artificial, retractable fourth appendage which, literally, gave them a leg up on the competition.

Cameras caught the chicanery, however, and the judges called the men to an urgent meeting.

“Nowhere in the rules does it say,” said the men, “that we can’t use an extra limb.”

The judges harrumphed, “That’s ridiculous! The whole idea of a three-legged race is to use only three legs. Give back the trophy!”

“You mean we’re disqualified?” came the reply.

“Of course,” said the judges, “you Four-Footed.”

Dave’s Gone By Skit: RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #129 (7/12/2015): With a Little Help

click above to listen (audio file only)
click above to listen (audio only)

RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #129 (7/12/2015): With a Little Help

aired July 11, 2015 on Dave’s Gone By. Youtube clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbnngK8Kmws

RABBI SOL: Shalom Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon, the founder and spiritual leader of Temple Sons of Bitches.

DAVE: And this is Dave Lefkowitz, host of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio show –

RABBI SOL: with a Rabbinical Reflection for the week of July 12th, 2015. Take it away, Dave.

DAVE: Those of you who have seen Rabbi Sol onstage know that he loves music. It doesn’t always love him back, but the Rebbe feels that music and lyrics –

RABBI SOL: And a well-placed trombone solo –

DAVE: The combination of all those musical elements can say more in three minutes than a dozen speeches.

RABBI SOL: Or even a baker’s dozen, which is 13, and a nice deal, since you’re paying for 12, and they throw in an extra one for no charge. They should do that with condoms. Anyhoo, because music is so potent, songwriters are obligated to write lyrics that say something. Not just, “Ooh, I wanna shtup you,” or “Ooh, why did you stop shtupping me?”, or “Ooh, why are you shtupping my best friend?” or, if it’s a country song, “I love my truck.”

DAVE: And songs can also be cryptic, or indirect, with words that convey multiple meanings. Every tune is a byzantine Rorschach test for the listener.

RABBI SOL: Boy, doesn’t that sound like fun? My job as Rabbi is to help guide you, my listeners and parishioners, through the truth of these songs. The subtleties, the answers, the keys to their changing meaning and the meaning to their changing keys. I also chastise the songwriters if they’re being lazy or prurient or Michael Bolton.

DAVE: To that end, Rabbi Sol has volunteered to deconstruct a popular song, line by line, and offer his commentary. You may not agree with his interpretations, but as the Rabbi says:

RABBI SOL: Who the hell are you? Write your own Talmud.

DAVE: Today’s song is a classic by The Beatles. Written by Lennon and McCartney and sung by Ringo on their “Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” record.

RABBI SOL: A concept album that pretty much runs out of concept after the first two songs.

DAVE: Nevertheless, “With a Little Help from My Friends” remains among the catchiest and most enduring of The Beatles’ pop hits. But does it stand up under the Rabbi’s scrutiny?

RABBI SOL: I dunno, does it?

DAVE: Let’s find out. I’m gonna sing “With a Little Help from My Friends,” and Rabbi Sol will interrupt when he has something to say. Or even when he doesn’t.

RABBI SOL: Wait a minute. You’re gonna sing? You’ll do more damage to The Beatles than Yoko!

DAVE: Very funny, Rabbi.

RABBI SOL: You’re telling me! I saw you in a nightclub once where you promised to sing an entire album by the Beatles. You asked for audience requests. Everybody said, “Help!”

DAVE: All right, all right. Are you ready?

RABBI SOL: Am I ever?

DAVE: This is “With a Little Help from My Friends” . . . and from Rabbi Sol.

(play song with commentary)

DAVE: “What would you think if I sang out of tune?”

RABBI SOL: I’d think, “why are you singing? What, do you wanna torture me?” 

DAVE: “Would you stand up and walk out on me?”

RABBI SOL: No, I would probably stay until the end of the song; I would be polite. But I would not be buying the CD.

DAVE: “Lend me your ears, and I’ll sing you a song.”

RABBI SOL: You just told me you sing out of key. Why are you gonna sing me a song?

DAVE: “And I’ll try not to sing out of key.”

RABBI SOL: Oh, you’re gonna try. Oh, thank you. Oh, thank you so much for your mercy! I’m gonna try not to vomit in my mouth.

DAVE: “Oh, I’ll get by with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: Ah, don’t we all?

DAVE: “Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: You must live in Colorado.

DAVE: “Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: Yeah, try harder.

DAVE: “What do I do when my love is away?”

RABBI SOL: Flirt with teenage girls on Facebook?

DAVE: “Does it worry you to be alone?”

RABBI SOL: Worry me? I love being alone! I have 21-and-a-half children; I’m never alone!

DAVE: “How do I feel by the end of the day?”

RABBI SOL: How do you feel by the end of the day? Obviously, not exhausted by singing lessons.

DAVE: “Are you sad because you’re on your own? No, I get by with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: Maybe you need some more help.

DAVE: “Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: So, basically, your friends are enablers?”

DAVE: “Mm, gonna try with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: I really hope they’re helping.

DAVE: “Do you need anybody?”

RABBI SOL:  Yes, I need a roofer.

DAVE: “I need somebody to love. Could it be anybody?” 

RABBI SOL: Well, it’s carpentry work, so I would prefer Irish.

DAVE: “I want somebody to love.”

RABBI SOL: Yes, you and me both. Natalie Portman, are you listening? And do you charge by the hour?

DAVE: “Would you believe in a love at first sight?”

RABBI SOL: Yes! Me and a pastrami sandwich!

DAVE: “Yes, I’m certain that it happens all the time. What do you see when you turn out the light?”

RABBI SOL: When I turn out the light, it’s dark. I don’t see anything. What are you, a moron?

DAVE: “I can’t tell you but I know it’s mine.”

RABBI SOL: I don’t know what’s yours but don’t be touching it in the dark. That’s just perverse.

DAVE: “Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends.” 

RABBI SOL: Oy, again with the friends. 

DAVE: “Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: Again with the high? Have you tried edibles?

DAVE: “Yes, gonna try with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: Keep trying.

DAVE: “Do you need anybody?”

RABBI SOL: I need a minyan this Friday night. 

DAVE: “I just need someone to love. Could it be anybody?”

RABBI SOL: We’ll take men, women, dogs. Doesn’t really matter.

DAVE: “I want somebody to love. Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: You need a lotta help, buddy.

DAVE: “Mm, I get high with a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: I get chai with a little help from my friends! Heh heh.

DAVE: “Yes, gonna try with a little help from my friends. With a little help from my friends. With a little help from my friends.” 

RABBI SOL: So, nu, where are these friends who are supposed to show up already?

DAVE: “With a little help from my friends.”

RABBI SOL: Oy, I need a lotta help from my iTunes if it’s playing this shit.

(song ends)

RABBI SOL: Well, that was painful. But I hope you all learned something about not taking songs for granted. The composers are trying to tell you something, so it’s important to listen, digest, and make up your own mind. Or make up your own lyrics. (sings, “There’s a bathroom on the right…”) Speaking of which . . .

DAVE: Oh dear, it’s the Rabbi’s private time. With his privates. So this has been a Rabbinical Reflection with me, Dave Lefkowitz. (sings) Her majesty’s a pretty nice girl, but she doesn’t have a lot to say.”

RABBI SOL: Count yourself lucky. I got a queen at home; she never shuts up! Temple Sons of Bitches in Great Neck, New York. and ani, Rabbi Sol Solomon

(c) 2015 TotalTheater. All rights reserved.

Dave’s Gone By #517 (7/11/2015): FRIENDS IN DEED

Click above to listen to the episode (audio only).

Here is the 517th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, July 11, 2015. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Greeley Crimes & Old Times, Rabbi Sol Solomon deconstructs The Beatles, Wretched Pun of Destiny (UPenn), Dylan – Sooner & Later (Pat Garrett), Saturday Segues (Peter Schickele, In the News), Inside Broadway.

Host: Dave Lefkowitz
Guest: Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce (7-Eleven on 7/11, Long Johns update)
00:35:30 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES, part 1
00:50:00 Sponsors
01:00:30 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES, part 2
01:17:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – Peter Schickele
01:40:00 INSIDE BROADWAY
02:11:00 THE WRETCHED PUN OF DESTINY #44 (UPenn)
02:14:00 Friends
02:23:00 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (Pat Garrett)
02:43:00 Weather
02:48:00 RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #129 – With a Little Help
02:58:30 SATURDAY SEGUE – In the News
03:31:00 Upcoming
DAVE GOES OUT

July 11, 2015 Playlist: “This is Professor Pete” (01:21:30), “Triumph of Thusnelda (Two Madrigals)” (01:22:30) & “The Stoned Guest (Completion)” (01:28:30; P.D.Q. Bach). “I Have a Noble Cock” (02:09:30; Canterbury Tales 1969 Bway cast). “Turkey Chase” (02:28:30), “Billy 4” (02:32:00), “River Theme” (02:37:00), “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” (Bob Dylan). “With a Little Help from My Friends” (02:51:30) & “Can’t Buy Me Love” (03:04:00; The Beatles). “I Go to Extremes” (02:59:30; Billy Joel). “Kill the Mockingbird” (03:06:00; House of Freaks). “Dear Mr. Supercomputer” (03:09:00; Sufjan Stevens). “Tennis Court” (03:13:30; Lorde). “With a Little Help from My Friends” (03:38:00; Richie Havens).

Peter Schickele
Dylan’s Pat Garrett & Billy the Kid
UPenn

Dave’s Gone By Wretched Pun of Destiny #044: UPENN

Click above to listen.

The 44th Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired July 11, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.
More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

*
44.
The summer before his senior year, a University of Pennsylvania student proposes to his girlfriend. He wants the wedding in Philadelphia, but she demands they get married in Jefferson County because her family, from her great-great-grandfather all the way to her dad, has lived and worked in the coal mines there for generations.

After the ceremony and a little drunk, the guy is driving his bride back towards campus.

Unfortunately, a cop stops him for speeding and weaving a little out of his lane. “Aw, come on, officer,” says the student. “It’s my wedding day.”

“Don’t argue,” says the cop. “You’re speeding and driving under the influence.”

“I may be a little tipsy,” admits the student, “but if you bring this to court, no jury on earth would convict me. I’d even represent myself!”

“Ha!” says the cop. “You’re just a college kid. Studying what, history?”

“Engineering,” comes the reply.

“So you’re an engineer, and you’re gonna defend yourself in court?”

“That’s right,” says the student. “Engineering is my major. But thanks to her dad, now I have a Miner In-Law.”


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