holidays – Dave's Gone By

Dave’s Gone By Skit: RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #110 (11/16/2014): Christmas in November

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RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #110 (11/16/2014): Christmas in November

aired Nov. 15, 2014 on Dave’s Gone By. Youtube clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugLGtx38doQ

Shalom Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon with a Rabbinical Reflection for the week of November 17, 2014.

Merry Christmas, non-Jewish listeners! A very merry Christmas and Yuletide to all the goyim within the sound of my strident voice! Jingle bells, glad tidings, joyeux Noel – whatever the hell that means — Merry Chris — wait, what? You mean it’s not Christmas? You mean it’s not even Thanksgiving yet, and Christmas is a month and a half away?

Well, you wouldn’t know it. Not from the TV commercials. Not from the music they play in the department stores. Not from the displays in Walgreens and Walmart and K-Mart and K.Y. and why is it Christmas already when it isn’t December 25th for another 35 days?

We all know why, of course. It’s because America needs to sell you crap as much and as often as possible. The home shopping networks and the mall shopping outlets want to get you in the money-spending spirit as soon as they can. If they could start next year’s holiday sales on December 26th at midnight, they would. In fact, they already almost do. In the middle of July, QVC and HLN and the CIA are doing infomercials for ornaments. “Make sure you order them now, people, so they arrive by August — just in time for Christmas.”

As a Jew, but not just as a Jew, but mainly as a Jew, I object to all this haranguing, day after day after day over a holiday I do not believe in and couldn’t care less about. You wanna put up some lights on the weekend before Christmas, and maybe start the Ruh-puh-pum-pum on your drum a week or two before the holiday? Be my guest, and buy me something nice. But stop with the Yuletide cheer when I haven’t even gotten all the matzoh out of my colon from Passover yet!

I have spoken before and elsewhere about the pressure Jews feel to morph Chanukah into a Yuletide-like holiday…Chrismakkah…a concept which fills me with enough loathing to stuff a Santa suit. They are not similar holidays; they are not equivalent holidays. And yet, because they fall at the same time of year, Yiddlach feel compelled to match their neighbors gift for gift, light for light, stupid singalong for stupid singalong. The only thing that keeps me from jamming hot knitting needles through my eardrums this time of year is Adam Sandler, and even that song wears out its welcome by its third spin. Try playing “Here Comes Chanukah” as often as Rite Aid plays “The Christmas Song,” and you’ll want to open every bottle in the pharmacy and swallow till the pain stops.

Holiday overkill is bad enough two or three weeks out of the year, but a whole month? You got radio stations that play only Christmas music. Some stores block off entire sections for stocking stuffers the day after Labor Day. Just stop it! Stop it! Nobody’s roasting chestnuts on an open anything. If grandma’s getting run over, it’s by grandpa’s Rascal, not a reindeer.

And I know Christmas is an excuse for people to do nice things and feel good about themselves. Soldiers stuck in a sandpit in Trashcanistan have a chance to come home and see their families because it’s Christmas. Why the army can’t do that on Groundhog Day just the same is beyond me, but okay. It’s like supermarkets that give the destitute free turkey on Thanksgiving. Fantastic — homeless people have a dozen meal options on Thanksgiving Day. The day after Thanksgiving? Pfftth. Back to 99-cent pizza and Spaghettios.

Still, if we use the holiday as an impetus to be better humans and do more good, even the cranky, miserable misanthrope in me cannot object to that. But the time leading up to the holiday is about nothing more than marketing and selling and forced, fake, phony good cheer. It’s all too much, too soon, and if I sound like the Grinch, so be it. Especially since I’m not trying to steal Christmas. I just want to hide it for awhile, like the Afikomen, so that, as an accountant would say, the interest appreciates.

No Marine comes home on special leave November 8th. Nobody’s donating cans to the food bank on December 12th. We’re subjected to the hype but not the help. I say, if big business must turn Christmas into a season-long capitalist orgy, at least give out condoms of compassion to go with it.

This has been a Rabbinical Reflection from Rabbi Sol Solomon, Temple Sons of Bitches in Great Neck, New York. Ooh, only 288 shopping days until Simchas Torah!

–> https://davesgoneby.net/?p=27488

Dave’s Gone By #446 (11/30/2013): SAY CHEESE

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Here is the 446th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, Nov. 30, 2013. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with cheese sculptor Sarah Kaufmann. Plus: Inside Broadway, Rabbi Sol’s Rabbinical Reflection on Thanksgiving Meeting Chanukah, Bob Dylan – Sooner & Later (grateful), and Thanksgivukkah Saturday Segue.

host: Dave Lefkowitz

Guests: cheese sculptor Sarah Kaufmann, Dave’s wife Joyce

Note: Because of recording difficulties, some of the spoken portions of this episode are of less-than-optimal audio quality

00:00:00 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce (football, nostalgia & New Orleans)
00:54:30 SATURDAY SEGUE – Thanksgivukkah
01:18:00 Sponsors
01:21:00 INSIDE BROADWAY
01:50:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Sarah Kaufmann
02:12:00 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (grateful)
02:35:00 Friends & Thanks
02:41:00 RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #83 – Thanksgiving Meets Chanukah
02:48:00 DAVE GOES OFF – Current Events
02:56:00 Upcoming
02:59:00 DAVE GOES OUT

Nov. 30, 2013 Playlist: “Give Thanks and Praise” (00:55:00; Bob Marley). “Chanukah” (00:58:00; Lewis Black). “I Have a Little Dreidel” (01:03:00; Groovebarbers). “Thanks to You” (01:04:00; Chris Smither). “Grateful” (01:06:30; Blake Babies). “Thanks” (01:09:30; Pere Ubu). “Thanks for the Memory” (01:12:00; Bing Crosby). “Julie Taymor & Bono in Spider-Man” (01:33:30; Forbidden Broadway – Alive & Kicking!). “Question and Answer” (01:43:30; Violet 1997 off-Broadway cast). “The Cheese Alarm” (01:46:00; Robyn Hitchcock). “The Cheeky Cheese” (02:10:30; Sexton Ming & Billy Childish). “Covenant Woman” (02:13:00), “Tough Mama” (02:19:00), “One More Cup of Coffee” ({live 1975 version}; 02:23:00) & “We Better Talk This Over” (02:28:30; Bob Dylan). “Shir Amami” (03:00:30; Jane Siberry).

Dave’s Gone By #337 (12/25/2010): WASSAIL AWAY

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Here is the 337th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, Dec. 25, 2010. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Host: Dave Lefkowitz

Guest: Dave’s wife Joyce

Featuring: Dave is joined by his lovely wife, Joyce, in celebrating Festivus and other seasonal holidays via decidedly non-traditional music.

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN – Festivus
00:22:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – Xmas
00:38:00 GUEST: Joyce
00:59:00 Dave
01:11:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – More Xmas
01:34:30 DAVE GOES OFF – Airport Screenings
01:44:00 More News
01:47:00 SATURDAY SEGUE: Xmas Continued
02:00:00 GUEST: Joyce Weil
02:03:00 Bob Dylan: “Sooner & Later” (Xmas)
02:25:30 Dave & Joyce
02:52:00 Sponsors
02:57:00 DAVE GOES OUT

Dec. 25, 2010 Playlist: “Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies” (00:22:00) & “Auld Lang Syne” (01:30:00 & 02:01:00) & “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” (02:40:30; Flatulina). “The Lonely Jew on Christmas” (00:24:00; South Park). “Santa Claus is Watching You” (00;26:00; Ray Stevens). “My First Christmas as a Woman” (00:30:00; The Vandals). “It’s So Chic to Be Pregnant at Christmas” (00:32:00; Nancy White). “Gridlock Christmas” (00:35:00; The Hollytones). “Jingle Bells” (00:41:00; Barking Dogs). “Mr. Chicken Does Jingle Bells” (00:43:00). “Farm Animal Jingle Bells” (00:45:00) & “The Diarrhea Song” (Youtube clips; 00:50:00). “There Ain’t No Santa Claus on the Evening Stage” (01:10:00; Captain Beefheart). “I’m a Christmas Tree” (01:14:00; Wild Man Fischer & Dr. Demento). “A Terrorist Christmas” (01:15:00; James & Kling). “We Killed Santa Claus” (01:18:00) & “Santasia” (01:54:00; Baxter Holvoe), “Hanukkah Rocks” (01:19:30; Gefilte Joe & the Fish). “Christmas in Cape Town” (01:23:00; Randy Newman). “No Christmas in Kentucky” (01:27:00; Phil Ochs). “River” (01:47:00; Joni Mitchell). “There Ain’t No Santa Claus” (01:51:00; Benny Bell). “A Christmas Carol” (01:58:30) & “The Masochism Tango” 02:37:00; Tom Lehrer). “Do You Hear What I Hear” (02:03:30), “The Christmas Blues” (02:06:30), “Gospel Plow” (02:09:30), “I Believe in You” (00:39:00), “Must Be Santa” (02:16:00) & “Forever Young” (live; 02:18:30; Bob Dylan). “Where the Wild Roses Grow” (02:41:00; Nick Cave). “Never You Change” (02:45:00; Toots & the Maytals). “The Sound of Silence” (02:49:00; Simon & Garfunkel).

Dave’s Gone By Interview (2/3/2005): TOM PERIC & Rabbi Sol Solomon

Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with publicist, holiday expert and “Wacky Days” author, Tom Peric

Topics include: holidays, Wacky Days.

Segment originally aired Feb. 3, 2005, as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast: Full Episode.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com
More information on Rabbi Sol Solomon: http://www.shalomdammit.com

Dave’s Gone By #113 (2/3/2005): WACKY DAVES

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Here is the 113th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on NY’s WGBB-AM radio, Feb. 3, 2020. Info: davesgoneby.com.

host: Dave Lefkowitz
guest: author Tom Peric (“Wacky Days”)

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with author and holiday expert Tom Peric. Plus the satirical News Gone By.

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN
00:04:00 RABBI SOL SOLOMON interviews publicist Tom Peric
00:34:00 NEWS GONE BY
00:50:00 DAVE GOES OUT

Feb. 3, 2005 Playlist: no music

Dave’s Gone By #15 (1/12/2003): TO BE YOUNG, GIFTED, & DAVE

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Here is the 15th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on WGBB-AM, Jan. 12, 2003. More info: davesgoneby.com.

host: Dave Lefkowitz

Guest appearance: radio host Joe Salzone

Featuring: For Martin Luther King’s birthday, Dave Gets Poetic on modern black poetry and holidaze; salutes Shooby Taylor and offers the satirical News Gone By. Plus: the Cleola Bevers & MLK skit.

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN
00:13:00 NEWS GONE BY
00:26:00 Tribute to Shooby Taylor
00:39:00 SKIT: Cleola Bevers & MLK
00:50:00 DAVE GOES POETIC on Modern Black Poetry
01:07:00 DAVE GOES OFF – Holidaze
01:13:00 DAVE GOES OUT

January 12, 2003 Playlist: “MLK” & “Pride (in the Name of Love)” U2, “Freedom” Richie Havens (11:00), “Lift Ev’ry Voice and Sing” (William “Shooby” Taylor), “I Don’t Want Nobody to Give Me Nothing, Just Open Up the Door…” (James Brown), “By the Time I Get to Arizona” (Public Enemy), “Ol’ Man River” (Screamin’ Jay Hawkins, 73:00).