The 18th Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired Dec. 27, 2014 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.
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18.
The Beach Boys are flying to a gig when their private jet starts having engine trouble. “Grab your parachutes,” says the pilot. “You’re gonna have to jump.”
“Jump?!” The band says. “We don’t know how to do that!”
“It’s easy,” says the pilot. “If you’re nervous, just focus on two things: make believe that you are your favorite Chinese meal, and then encourage your bandmates to be heroic. Here, watch me.”
The pilot opens the hatch and says, “I’m egg foo yung! So long, fearless friends!,” and jumps from the plane.
Al Jardine goes up next, grabs his chute and shouts, “I’m beef with broccoli! Adios, courageous crew!” And he jumps out.
Mike Love walks to the hatch, gulps and says, “I’m spare ribs! Ciao, my bold bold buddies,” as he, too, leaps from the aircraft.
Brian Wilson reaches the door, but he stops. “I can’t do it,” he says to his brothers Dennis and Carl. “You know I’ve got writer’s block. I can’t think of anything!”
Dennis says, “You have to!”
“I can’t,” says Brian. “I’m drawing a blank.”
“Well, if you can’t say it,” says Carl, “try singing it.”
“That’s it!” says Brian Wilson, pulling the ripcord. “I’m Peking Duck, Goodbye Brave Chums!”
