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Dave’s Gone By Skit: RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #125 (5/23/2015): Harry Shearer

RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #125 (5/23/2015): Harry Shearer

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(aired May 23, 2015 on Dave’s Gone By. Youtube clip: https://youtu.be/PO1sDbOFvbo)

Shalom Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon with a Rabbinical Reflection for the week of May 17, 2015.

I’m just wild about Harry, but he’s not wild about us . . . anymore. Last week was a sad time for television viewers–not a tragic one, just sad–because the producers of The Simpsons announced that one of their main voices, a crucial shard of their audio mosaic, Harry Shearer, would not return for the last two seasons of this legendary program. I know, I know. The Simpsons without Harry Shearer is like The Dick Van Dyke show without Mel Cooley. It’s like an all-you-can-eat buffet without a salad bar. It’s like a rabbit vibrator without those extra ears on the bottom. Or sure, it still does a competent job, but your clitoris knows something’s missing.

Harry Shearer, a nice but strange Jewish boy, will always hold my allegiance, not just because of Spinal Tap and A Mighty Wind, and The Simpsons, but because he was also a devoted fan of the early Chabad Lubavitch telethons. He would hold parties for friends and cheer for John Voigt, and presumably do a shot every time the Rabbis started dancing. That kind of mockery blended with admiration is something I aspire to every day.

I also aspire to make $7 million a year, something that will never happen unless I hit Lotto and get in Bill Gates’s will. Harry Shearer could make $7 million for the next two years. All he has to do is continue voicing characters on The Simpsons: Principal Skinner, Ned Flanders, Mr. Burns, Kent Brockman and the goyische Reverend Lovejoy. If a studio offered you $14 million to stand in front of a microphone and say funny things once a week, would you turn it down? My God, for $14 million, I would bite off the penis of a live goat three times a day and five on Shabbos.

But Harry Shearer is above all that. Negotiations may not completely be finished, but Shearer has so far turned down the opportunity to make a paycheck so astronomical, Stephen Hawking couldn’t count the zeroes. And Shearer turned it down on principal. Principal and interest. If you believe his tweets, Shearer is mad because his contract doesn’t allow him the leeway to do other projects. Which is weird considering he’s done bunches of small movie roles, a stage play on the West End, and a weekly podcast for NPR.

On their side, the Simpsons producers still hope for a change of heart. They say Shearer’s contract is the same as all the other major players, and there’s only so much they can bend before they start looking like Mr. Burns.

The weird news is that showrunner Al Jean has stated that instead of retiring characters, as they did when Phil Hartman kicked the bucket, The Simpsons will keep Shearer’s menagerie and just recast them with different voices. Really? Ask yourself, has Kermit really been Kermit post-Jim Henson? Don’t we still feel trauma about the two Darrens in Bewitched? And can you watch later episodes of Cold Case without wondering “Whatever happened to that pretty blonde actress who starred in the show?” before realizing, “Oh, it’s still her”?

I certainly hope Harry Shearer reconsiders and brings us two more seasons of “oodley doodleys” and “Smithers” and “Boo-urns.” But if he must be sprung from Springfield, leave his people be. It’s a big city. You can have new neighbors and school administrators and evil bosses—just as in real life. And all those fans who bitch on the internet, “Oh, The Simpsons has been in a rut since the third season” – now they’ll say, “Oh, The Simpsons has sucked since the third season, but at least they’re not in a rut.”

And you know, if they’re looking for new faces in Homer’s neighborhood, this does coincide with the last season of Aqua Teen Hunger Force. So there’s a meatball, a French fry and a shake that are busy house hunting. Just keep Lisa away from Carl. No good can come of that.

This has been a Rabbinical Reflection from Rabbi Sol Solomon, Temple Sons of Bitches in Great Neck, New York.

–> https://wp.me/pzvIo-1Vx

Dave’s Gone By Interview (5/16/2015): BETSY McFARLAND & Rabbi Sol Solomon

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Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews the daughter of Spanky McFarland, Betsy McFarland

Topics include: Our Gang, The Little Rascals, Stymie, cancer, Michael Jackson

Segment scheduled to air May 16, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

More information about Rabbi Sol Solomon: http://www.shalomdammit.com

Dave’s Gone By #509 (5/16/2015): SPANK YOU VERY MUCH

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Click above to listen to the episode (audio only).

Here is the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, May 16, 2015. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with Betsy McFarland, Rabbi Sol’s Rabbinical Reflection (Baby Names), The Wretched Pun of Destiny, My Sick Mind (Amtrak), Inside Broadway, Saturday Segues (In the News, Jonathan Richman), Greeley Crimes & Old Times, Dylan – Sooner & Later (Blonde on Blonde).

Host: Dave Lefkowitz

Guest: Betsy McFarland, Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce (fat Dave, Long Johns, chock full)
00:31:00 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES
00:58:00 DAVE GOES FURTHER IN (new logo, critic v. critic, csc, crowd funding, trio album)
01:21:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – Jonathan Richman
01:37:30 Sponsors
01:46:30 RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #124 – Baby Names
01:51:30 INSIDE BROADWAY
02:23:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Betsy McFarland
03:38:30 Friends
03:47:00 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (Blonde on Blonde)
04:14:30 MY SICK MIND – Amtrak
04:20:00 THE WRETCHED PUN OF DESTINY #36 – Salk
04:22:00 Weather
04:26:30 SATURDAY SEGUE – In the News
04:59:30 DAVE GOES OUT

May 16, 2015 Playlist: “I’m a Little Airplane” (01:24:00), “The Sea was Calling Me Home” (01:26:30), “She Cracked” (01:28:00), “Her Mystery Not of High Heels and Eye Shadow” (01:31:00) & “Buzz Buzz Buzz” (01:33:30; Jonathan Richman). “Welcome to the Renaissance” (02:18:30; Something Rotten! 2015 Broadway cast). “Pledging My Time” (03:52:30) & “Absolutely Sweet Marie” (03:56:30; Bob Dylan). “Just Like a Woman” (04:01:30; Nina Simone). “Electric Chair” (04:28:30; The Scottsboro Boys 2010 Bway cast). “Song for David” (04:32:30; Joan Baez). “Loco Man” (04:37:30; “A Mighty Wind” soundtrack w/ Harry Shearer). “Casey Jones” (04:39:30; The Grateful Dead). “There Must Be a Better World Somewhere” (04:44:00) & “I’m Movin’ On” (05:02:00; B.B. King).

Dave’s Gone By Wretched Pun of Destiny #036 (5/16/2015): SALK

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The 36th Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired May 16, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.
More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

*
36
One afternoon, early in his career, Jonas Salk is so busy with his medical research that he forgets it’s Valentine’s Day. When a lab technician reminds him, Salk drops everything, runs to his car, and picks up his wife to give her a whirlwind romantic evening.

First, he stops at a florist and buys her a long-stemmed red rose. Then he brings her to an ice-cream parlor and gives her a strawberry cone—her favorite. Finally, he drives her to his lab and exhibits all his petri dishes, telling her, “one day this will change the world!”

His wife hugs him and says, “Jonas, I love you. But I have to say, this was a very unusual Valentine’s itinerary.”

“I know,” smiles the scientist. “I call it my `Spanish dinner plan.”

“Spanish dinner?” says Mrs. Salk. “You gave me a flower, an ice-cream cone, and a vaccine.

What does that have to do with Spanish food?”

“Darling,” Salk replies. “Haven’t you ever heard of A Rose Cone Polio?”

Dave’s Gone By #508 (5/9/2015): WINNING STREAK

click above for episode #508 (audio only)

Click above to listen to the episode (audio only).

Here is the 508th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, May 9, 2015. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with musician Ray Stevens. Plus: Inside Broadway, The Wretched Pun of Destiny (weightlifter), Saturday Segues (Billy Joel, In the News), Greeley Crimes & Old Times, Dylan – Sooner & Later (Ray songs).

Host: Dave Lefkowitz
Guests: singer-songwriter Ray Stevens, Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce (indoor graduation, streaking, The Miracle of Long Johns)
00:31:30 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES
01:00:00 DAVE GOES FURTHER IN w/ Joyce (Etan Patz, rain)
01:06:30 Weather
01:09:30 SATURDAY SEGUE – Billy Joel
01:29:00 Sponsors
01:36:00 INSIDE BROADWAY (news (01:36:00) & review (The Audience (01:51:00))
02:13:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Ray Stevens
03:10:30 Technical Difficulties
03:14:00 THE WRETCHED PUN OF DESTINY #35 – Weightlifter
03:16:30 Friends
03:27:30 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later – Ray Words
03:55:30 SATURDAY SEGUE – In the News
04:16:00 Thanks
04:18:30 DAVE GOES OUT – Vin Scelsa

May 9, 2015 Playlist: “Don’t Ask Me Why” (01:15:00), “Everybody Loves You Now” (01:18:00), “Surprise” (01:21:00) & “And So it Goes” (01:24:00; Billy Joel). (“Now” 02:08:30; Tami Muti & Kelli Barrett). “Turn Your Radio On” (02:13:00), “Jeremiah Peabody’s Polyunsaturated Quick-Dissolving Fast-Acting Pleasant Tasting Green And Purple Pills (02:24:00), “Misty” (02:30:00), “Gitarzan” (02:36:30), “Everything is Beautiful” (02:42:30), “Taylor Swift is Stalkin’ Me” (02:50:30), “Nashville” (02:59:00) & “The Streak” (03:03:30; Ray Stevens). “Dreamin’ of You” (03:28:30), “A Hard Rain’s a-Gonna Fall” ({1962 Gaslight version}; 03:34:30) & “Bob Dylan’s 115th Dream” (03:41:00; Bob Dylan). “This Tornado Loves You” (Neko Case; 03:56:30). “Pass the Football” (Wonderful Town, 1953 Broadway cast; 03:59:30). “The Spy (Version 2)” (The Doors; 04:02:30). “A Well-Respected Man” (The Kinks). “Goodnight Ladies” (04:26:00; Lou Reed).

Dave’s Gone By Wretched Pun of Destiny #035 (5/9/2015): WEIGHTLIFTER

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The 35th Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired May 9, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

All content (c)2015 TotalTheater Productions.
More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

35.
“Doc,” says the professional weightlifter, “ya gotta help me with my problem. Every day, I follow the same routine for lunch and dinner. I eat two bowls of pasta so I can carbo-load, then I pee in a cup for my drug test.”

“Sounds perfectly fine,” says the doctor.

“Wait, this is where it gets weird. As soon as I close the cup, I start having this incredibly hot daydream about that financial woman on TV.”

“Suze Orman?”

“Yeah, her! And before I know it, my knees buckle and my pants get all sticky. It’s killing my energy.”

“Let me get this straight,” says the doctor. “Pasta, pee, Suze Orman fantasy, and then a discharge?”

“Right” says the weightlifter. “Is it serious?”

“Nah,” says the MD. “A lot of musclemen get this. We call it `Larry David Syndrome.’”

“’Larry David Syndrome’? What on earth does it have to do with that guy?”

“Well,” says the doctor, “I guess you’ve never heard of `Carb-Urine-Suzy-Gasm.’”

Dave’s Gone By Interview (5/2/2015): STEVE GOTTLIEB & Rabbi Sol Solomon

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Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews photographer Steve Gottlieb

Topics include: Flush, Washington DC.

Segment aired May 2, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com
More information about Rabbi Sol Solomon: http://www.shalomdammit.com

Dave’s Gone By Wretched Pun of Destiny #034 (5/3/2015): OPERETTA

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The 34th Wretched Pun of Destiny segment aired April 4, 2015 as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

*
34.
On a break from shooting his latest film, Sean Penn flies to Hawaii to visit his favorite relatives: two spinster aunts who have lived together for decades.

Not only are they wonderful ladies, but they’ve done well in business together–right out of their basement–by selling authentic Hawaiian foods like macadamia nuts and poi and spam to customers around the world.

When Sean Penn gets to their house, however, he immediately calls the cops because he smells something bad at the front door. The police break in and make the tragic discovery that both women are dead from carbon monoxide poisoning. To get out of the cops’ way, the actor goes down to the basement–but that just makes him even more distraught because all the food there is infested with mice and vermin.

Soon, the CDC arrives, and neighbors are treated to the sight of health inspectors carrying out living and dead mice covered with remnants of Hawaiian food. One neighbor turns to the other and says, “You know, this makes me think of an operetta.”

“An operetta? What on earth are you talking about?”

“Well,” says the first guy. “haven’t you ever heard of `The Poi-Rats of Penn’s Aunts?”

Dave’s Gone By #507 (5/2/2015): ROYAL FLUSH

click above for episode #507 (audio only)

click above to listen to the episode (audio only).

Here is the 507th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, May 2, 2015. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with photographer Steve Gottlieb (“Flush: Celebrating Bathrooms Past and Present”). Plus: Rabbi Sol’s Rabbinical Reflection on Popeyes, Saturday Segues (Ben E. King, In the News), Greeley Crimes & Old Times, Bob Dylan – Sooner & Later (testing), Inside Broadway, The Wretched Pun of Destiny (operetta).

Host: Dave Lefkowitz

Guests: photographer Steve Gottlieb, Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce Weil (Room C, brain bucket, Vin Scelsa, Fordham)
00:40:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – Ben E. King
00:59:30 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES
01:29:00 Sponsors
01:30:30 DAVE GOES AWAY – New York (MoMa & The Frick)
02:01:00 Sponsors
02:05:30 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Steve Gottlieb
02:53:00 INSIDE BROADWAY (news (02:53:00) & reviews: The Heidi Chronicles (03:21:30) & The King and I (03:31:00)
03:48:00 THE WRETCHED PUN OF DESTINY #34 (operetta)
03:52:30 Weather
03:55:30 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (testing)
04:16:00 Friends
04:26:00 RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #123 (Popeyes)
04:34:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – In the News
04:54:30 DAVE GOES OUT

“I Count the Tears” (00:44:30) & “This Magic Moment” (00:46:30; (The Drifters). “Supernatural Thing, Part 1” (00:49:00) & “Stand By Me” (00:53:00), “It’s All in the Game” (04:57:00; Ben E. King). “Flushed from the Bathroom of Your Heart” (02:50:30; Johnny Cash). “Hello, Young Lovers” (03:43:30; Renee Fleming). “Born in Time” (03:57:00), “Property of Jesus” (04:01:00), “Maybe Someday” (04:05:30) & “Can You Please Crawl Out Your Window” ({alt. version}, 04:09:00; Bob Dylan). “Good Morning Baltimore” (04:34:00; Hairspray 2002 Broadway cast w/ Marissa Jaret Winokur). “Boxing” (04:38:00; Ben Folds). “Earthquakes” (04:42:30; Luie Luie). “May Day (There’s a Riot Goin’ Down) (04:45:00; Passing Strange 2008 Bway cast w/ Stew). “Dirty Bridge” (04:46:30; Amy Rigby).

Cezanne’s “Pines and Rocks (Fontainebleau?).”

Dave’s Gone By #506 (4/18/2015): PLEASANTLY PLYMP

click above for episode #506 (audio only)

Click above to listen to the episode (audio only).

Here is the 506th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, April 18, 2015. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with animator Bill Plympton (“Cheatin’,” “Your Face”). Plus: Rabbi Sol’s Rabbinical Reflection on the 2016 candidates, Inside Broadway, Saturday Segues (Percy Sledge, In the News), The Wretched Pun of Destiny (Hangover), Greeley Crimes & Old Times.

Host: Dave Lefkowitz

Guests: animator Bill Plympton, Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce (dandruff, potatoes, egg creams, costumes)
00:24:30 GREELEY CRIMES & OLD TIMES
00:53:00 DAVE GOES FURTHER IN (Blackout!, Dave’s solo show)
01:16:30 SATURDAY SEGUE – Percy Sledge
01:36:00 INSIDE BROADWAY
02:05:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Bill Plympton
02:30:30 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (Altria)
02:50:30 Sponsors
02:57:00 RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #122 (2016 Candidates)
03:07:00 Friends
03:19:00 THE WRETCHED PUN OF DESTINY #33 (hangover)
03:47:30 Weather
03:49:30 Thanks & Upcoming
03:55:00 DAVE GOES OUT

April 11, 2015 Playlist: “Ketchup” (00:15:00; Tom Paxton). “Sudden Stop” (01:20:00), “Out of Left Field” (01:23:00), “When a Man Loves a Woman” (01:26:30) & “You Really Got a Hold on Me” (01:29:30; Percy Sledge). “Come to the Fun Home” (02:02:00; Fun Home 2014 off-Bway cast). “Your Face” (02:25:30; Maureen McElheron). “Things Have Changed” (02:33:30), “Simple Twist of Fate” ({live 1975 version} 02:38:30) & “Pay in Blood” (02:43:00; Bob Dylan). “Master Song” (03:22:30; Leonard Cohen). “Your Tax Dollars at Work” (03:28:00; Henry Phillips). “The Prisoner” (03:33:00; The Both). “Bussboys, McDonalds and Minimum Wage” (03:37:30; Chris Rock). “Hillary Will Survive” (03:39:00; The Capitol Steps). “The Happy Happy Joy Joy Song” (03:57:00; Wax).