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Dave’s Gone By Skit: RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #183 (4/20/2024): Passover 2024

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Rabbi Sol Solomon’s Rabbinical Reflection #183 (4/20/24): PASSOVER 2024

This Rabbinical Reflection first aired April 20, 2024 on the Dave’s Gone By video podcast.

Rabbi Sol Solomon offers reflections, and a timely poem, to celebrate this year’s particularly potent Passover holiday.

Rabbi Sol’s Rabbinical Reflections are heard on the long-running Dave’s Gone By radio/video podcast program (davesgoneby.com) and then archived as text and audio on the Rebbe’s blog, Shalomdammit.com, where a transcript of this Reflection may be read.

Rabbi Sol is also the creator of the stage show, “Shalom Dammit! An Evening with Rabbi Sol Solomon,” which played in NYC in Nov. 2011 and Aug. 2012.

TRANSCRIPT:

Shalom Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon with a Rabbinical Reflection for the 2024 Passover holiday.

Yes, my friends, it’s matzoh time again! Time to change the silverware, cover your tables, sell your leavened food and then buy it back when it’s stale — time to welcome a holiday that throws your life into chaos, just for a big meal that’s supposed to be about order. That’s the seder. Seder means order, structure, in Hebrew. So at the seder, we do one activity after another after another, in order, for two hours before we finally get to eat. Then we dine on wonderful things like horse radish and boiled eggs and flat bread that uses cardboard as its flavor profile. Mmm mmm, constipated!

But we do this, of course, to commemorate a miracle. Our Jewish ancestors, who spent decades as slaves to the Pharaohs, high-tailed it out of Egypt, thanks to Moses, his brother Aaron, and a God that actually talked to people back then. Or at least to Moses. They had that kind of relationship.

And so, 3500 years ago, the Jews left Eretz Mitzrayim, crossed the Red Sea — which slowly parted for them like the legs of an arthritic hooker—and wandered the desert for 40 years till all of them were dead. But their children made it to Israel. And that’s where the Jews have stayed until this very day. And, current events notwithstanding, they ain’t goin’ anywhere.

For decades now, I’ve ranted and raved and driven home one idea that even a pinhead like Susan Sarandon should understand: Israel is for Jews. Arabs can live anywhere else. Why don’t they? If all these Muslim countries refuse to make a home for their Palestinian brothers, well, that’s just too bad. There’s no reason the Palis can’t have a couple dozen square miles of Saudi Arabia, Sudan, Algeria, Mali, Pakistan,Turkmenistan, or Dearborn, Michigan. Palestinians want a country so bad? Give them one…far away. Suck them out of Gaza and the West Bank so Israelis can be free and safe…surrounded by a dozen countries that despise them.

Yet for all the horrible news and the burgeoning anti-Semitism, we can muster a smile or two this Pesach holiday. On Thursday, the president of Columbia University—an Arab no less—looked at the swarm of hippie hooligans disobeying orders to vacate the college’s lawns and said, finally, “If you don’t leave, I’m calling the cops.” They stayed, in came the riot squad, and more than a hundred imbeciles were arrested and suspended—not for being anti-Israel (that’s a given for these smelly hermaphrodites) but for trespassing on private property and assuming their bleeding-heart wokeness would be an impermeable escutcheon. Understand that they were non-violent, and so were the cops. Everybody got what they came for: President Shafik got her lawn back (for a day), the cops made their quota without a single speeding ticket, and the brats got on TV crying and laughing and showing every employer in America who not to hire at the next job fair.

On top of this heartening development of cracking down on crackpots—there’s more amazing news. A week ago, Iran sent hundreds of missiles streaming into Israel. I think one of them hit. All the rest were intercepted and bombed out of the sky by the vaunted “iron dome.” Where that dome was on October 7th is another story, but at least this time, it worked like gangbusters. Or bomb-busters. And after that, Israel hit back with a bunch of mini-drones that were mini enough to do minimal damage but scary enough to make the Tehran tyrants think twice about escalation.

So in these anxious and ugly times, when Jews face hatred from stupid goyim, and Israel faces hatred from stupid Jews, we can be thankful for some godly interventions that are at least trying to restore order. Seder.

And for those who still equate Zionism with oppressive colonialism as opposed to…”my house, my rules,” here’s some poetic justice:

“From the river to the sea, Hamas had better flee.

`Cuz way back in `48, the world made Israel a Jewish state.

The Arabs are welcome to work and play, but if you hurt us, we will slay.

We’ll bomb the tunnels Hamas built and turn their houses into silt.

If you prick us, we will bleed, but then we’ll get you, guaranteed.

If you’re a young and left-wing loony spewing your shit at the Ivies and SUNY

Not realizing Al Qaeda, Al Aqsa, Hamas

Are all the same evil, with all the same boss?

Please know that the monsters who caused 9/11

are back as the same butchers of October 7.

Yet millions of Arabs select them as leaders

and pledge their allegiance to these bottom feeders

who’ve vowed to push Israel straight off the map

Which is why we must blot them, like wiping up crap.

If they think they’ll win and cause Israel to vanish

“Joder a sus madres.” Look it up — it’s Spanish.

Israel will fight to the very last Jew — and make no mistake, they’re fighting for you.

`Cause if Muslims win, new maps they will draw that put the whole world under Sharia law.

So Israel will struggle, as lies leave her friendless

And Israel will fight, though the fighting is endless.

And Israel will win because Israel must and grind our foes into cockroach dust.

From Haifa to Tiberius, IDF is dead serious

From Kiryat Shmona all the way to Eilat, the Arabs can lick Golda Meir’s hairy grey twat.

From the sea to the river, we’ll make Hamas quiver.

And for year after year, Israel stays here.

This has been a Rabbinical Reflection from Rabbi Sol Solomon, Temple Sons of Bitches in Great Neck, New York. Happy Pesach seder to you — from border to border, we will restore order.

Dave’s Gone By Interview (2/24/2024): DEB MARGOLIN & Rabbi Sol Solomon

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Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with playwright DEB MARGOLIN

Topics include: Judaism, Split Britches, This is not a Time of Peace, Israel

Segment aired Feb. 24, 2024 as part of the 932nd episode of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio/video podcast program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full interview with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

More about Rabbi Sol Solomon: http://www.shalomdammit.com.

Dave’s Gone By #932 (2/24/2024): SIMPLY MARGVELOUS

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Here is the 932nd episode of the long-running radio show/video podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired live on Facebook Saturday morning, Feb. 24, 2024.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with playwright Deb Margolin, Colorado Limerick of the Damned (Flagler), Dave’s Big Dictionary.

Guest: writer-actress Deb Margolin

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce: radio complaints, crystal ball, birdseed, limericks, lost holidays, pregnant stingray, geodesic domes,
00:01:20 DAVE GOES FURTHER IN w/ Joyce: Sichuan Taste menu
01:41:30 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Deb Margolin
02:54:00 DAVE’S BIG DICTIONARY: dress, eminence, Hailey-Hailey Disease
03:02:30 Friends of the Daverhood
03:09:30 COLORADO LIMERICK OF THE DAMNED: Flagler, CO
03:13:30 DAVE GOES OUT

Deb Margoin

Dave’s Gone By Skit: Rabbi Sol Solomon’s Rabbinical Reflection #148 (8/6/2017): Roger Waters

RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #148 (8/6/17): Roger Waters

(aired Aug. 5, 2017 on Dave’s Gone By. Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C60YhWtS73Y)

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Shalom Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon with a Rabbinical Reflection for the week of August 6, 2017.

Today, my friends, I go swimming in foul waters. Brackish waters. Roger Waters! The former head of Pink Floyd is now a solo artist with delusions of relevance.

Waters has long been critical of Israel’s position vis-à-vis the Palestinians. According to Mr. Stink Floyd, Israel is always the bad guy: occupying land, denying Palis of their rights, existing. And Waters has made no attempt to hide his contempt for the only democracy—and sometimes the only civilized society—in the Middle East.

Who can forget the 2010 Waters concert, where his animated set design included B-1 bombers dropping mogen davids? Or, worse, the 2013 concerts, where, instead of launching beachballs and t-shirts into the crowd, he sent an inflatable pig with a Jewish star on it hovering over bewildered baby boomers, who just wanted him to shut up and play “The Wall.” And that’s the problem in a nutshell—or a nutcase. People still want to hear his old music, so that gives Waters a huge platform for his babble.

I’ll even grant that he thinks he means well. To Roger Waters, Israel is a torture state, an oppressive regime that doesn’t let a bunch of poor, bedraggled Arabs blow themselves up in peace. He’s not against Israel, he says; he doesn’t hate Jews; he’s merely a rabid anti-fascist. Except for someone who supposedly has nothing against Hebes, Waters takes every opportunity to savage our homeland. He equates Benjamin Netanyahu’s acceptance of Jewish settlements on Jewish land with South Africa’s apartheid and feels both should be countered the same way. As such, Waters has become the poster boy for BDS. You know BDS: Bondage, Domination, and Stupidity. Or more officially: Boycott, Divestment, Sanctions against Israel. In other words, hurt Israel financially, and the Jews will just slink off into the Red Sea and let the Palestinians take over land that they’ll just turn back into desert.

At least BDS isn’t the usual Moslem protest. Instead of flying planes into office walls, they just want to build a commerce wall around Israel. As part of his responsibilities being the BDS butt boy, Roger Waters has called on other musicians to avoid Eretz Yisroel and cancel any concerts they have planned there. In response, Thom Yorke and Radiohead, bless their hearts, went to Tel Aviv and played their longest concert in eleven years. Now granted, even they equivocated: “Playing in a country isn’t the same as endorsing its government,” Yorke said in a statement. “We don’t endorse Netanyahu any more than Trump, but we still play in America.”

Well, okay, I’ll accept Radiohead’s defensive half over Pink Floyd’s ass whole. And lest we think Roger Waters is anything other than a Goebbels with a guitar, look no further than his interview with the blatantly anti-Israel CounterPunch magazine. Waters complained about the “extraordinarily powerful” Jewish lobby in America, which he says makes it hard for other musicians to back him in his fulminating foolishness. Waters also bitched about Israel’s “right-wing rabbinate” supposedly causing, quote “the ethnic cleansing and systematic racist apartheid Israeli regime.” Ethnic cleansing. Right. Because Arabs are systematically murdered by the Israeli government for no other reason than the towels on their heads. Sure. That they start riots, kill soldiers, and blow themselves to pieces in cafes has nothing to do with Israel’s distrust of their breed.

I’m not saying Israel is perfect, or that the Prime Minister is right about everything. After all, a couple of weeks ago I, myself, blasted Netanyahu for reneging on a plan to make a small bit of the Wailing Wall co-ed. But I also understand what Israel is up against: ongoing hostility from the very neighbors who should take in the miserable Palestinians but won’t. For 80 years, little Israel has made the best of a situation that the Arabs have consistently made worse.

And Roger Waters? He won’t play Milk and Honey City? Let’s take a look at the schedule for his 2002 world tour, shall we? We shall. Let’s see, he started in South Africa in February. Well, there’s a country with a glorious history of justice. Oh, and then he moved on to Chile—no problems there. Argentina, which at the time was run by that bastion of morality, Carlos Menem. Let’s see…Brazil (where I’m sure Waters felt at home with the other Nazis), Venezuela (ditto), Mexico (because drugs and rock and roll do mix), Japan—because hegemonic nationalism was never an issue there. Oh, and then it was off to Beirut. Uh huh. And Moscow and Warsaw and Munich and Frankfurt and Stuttgart and Oberhausen and Vienna. Because when have Germany and Austria ever had a race problem?

A million times I have said that Israel is a Jewish state, and it is also a teeny-weeny state, so if the Palestinians don’t like living there, they should gas up their camels and move to any other Arab country that would have them. Which is, of course, none. Which is the real tragedy that putzes like Roger Waters, Susan Sarandon, Amy Goodman, and Javier Bardem never acknowledge. There is no occupation. There is a miniscule Jewish country that every Arab wants to level, and when the Jews fight back, or get strategic with blockades, the lefties wring their hankies and blame the good guys.

If I sound especially grim and intolerant, understand that I am writing this only a couple of days after three Israelis were stabbed to death by Palestinians in the West Bank, and a day after Arabs attacked the Israeli embassy in Jordan. Why the violence? The Palis were pissed off because Israel put in metal detectors by the Temple Mount. That started a riot, and three Arabs were shot by Israeli police. Yes, using deadly force against rioters is unfortunate, but over metal detectors? Something designed to keep everybody safe no matter what the religion? When I go in an airport, I’ve gotta take off my coat, my shoes, my belt, my watch. It’s a pain in the ass, but do I riot? No. And let’s not forget the reason we all have to get naked at JFK in the first place: the Arabs!

So Roger Troubled Waters, feel free to stay away from Israel. Plenty of bands who have actually made good music over the past forty years will take your place. And if you want to be the change you hope to see in the world, howsabout looking in the mirror? You were in Pink Floyd where the lead songwriter turned into an insane recluse, and the guy who replaced him can’t get along with you. You’ve been married four times—and divorced four times. And you’re an atheist, so even God has washed his hands of you.

You are the Pooper at the Gates of Dumb. You are the Atom Heartless Motherfucker. You’re the Dark Side of the Moron. The Final Cunt. A More-Than-Momentary Lapse of Reason. All in all, you’re just another Prick in the Wailing Wall, and I wish you weren’t here.

This has been a Rabbinical Reflection from Rabbi Sol Solomon, Temple Sons of Bitches, in Great Neck, New York.

https://davelefkowitzwriting.wordpress.com/2021/03/05/non-fiction-essay-humorous-rabbi-sol-solomons-rabbinical-reflection-148-8-6-17-roger-waters/

Dave’s Gone By Skit: RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #131 (8/22/2015): Jimmy Carter

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RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #131: Jimmy Carter

aired Aug. 22, 2015 on Dave’s Gone By. Youtube clip: https://youtu.be/ref1EipPIz8

Shalom, Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon with a Rabbinical Reflection for the week of August 23, 2015.

Two weeks ago, 90-year-old former president Jimmy Carter announced that he was battling an advanced stage of cancer—or, as Jewish people call it (whispers) cancer. Snipped from his liver was a tumor, but they also found badness elsewhere, which is not surprising since both of Carter’s parents, his two sisters, and his brother all died of pancreatic you-know-what.

Jimmy still has his 87-year-old wife, Rosalynn, who says she will be “right there with him” throughout his treatment. So will the town of Plains, Georgia, and a lot of Americans who remember Carter as one of the smartest, most honest, and most decent of men to occupy the oval office.

My feelings are a mite more mixed, however. Just because Carter was a mensch doesn’t mean he was a good President. In fact, up until George W. Bush, he was the worst Commander in Chief in a hundred years. And considering that crop included Richard Nixon and Warren G. Harding, that’s saying something.

In case you weren’t around from 1977 to 1981, what you missed was the recession, the oil crisis, the hostage crisis, the Cold War, and the confidence crisis. You know your President is a bona fide schlemiel when he has to go on television to tell everyone, “It’s not me, it’s you. Have a little faith.” Faith is hard to come by when you’re idling at the gas station for two hours on odd and even days, or when you can’t find a job to pay what gasoline costs, or you’re turning your thermostat to 50 because the Mullahs at OPEC want you to.

And speaking of the Arabs, the Carter years were also, of course, the years of the Ayatollah Khomeini. Fifty-two American hostages were taken prisoner as part of the Iranian Revolution. I suppose we should be grateful all the hostages survived. If they were captured now, Isis would cut their limbs off and rape the stumps. Still, these Americans remained in captivity for a year and a half, until Ronald Reagan made backroom deals to have them released on the first day of his presidency.

Until then, Jimmy Carter had three responses to the Iranian hostage crisis: He barricaded himself in his office for a hundred days, because as any eight-year-old knows, if you hide in the closet, nobody knows you’re there, and all the bad stuff goes away. His second tactic was to wear sweaters, because that’ll show those big bad oil sheiks we can live without heat. And finally, he sent helicopters to try a rescue mission—and they all crashed in the desert.

It was right about then America stopped laughing at Billy Carter and turned her woeful eyes on his older brother. If Watergate was a cancer on the Presidency, Jimmy Carter was a herpes all over it.

Still, lousy as Carter’s term was, I would still want to respect the man. After all, he brokered an impossible deal between Menachem Begin and Anwar Sadat to create a small piece of peace in the Middle East. It truly was and remains an unbelievable, wonderful, and, alas, one-of-a-kind event in that region. And yet, can peanut boy leave well enough alone?

No, he spends the last few years bleeding through his sleeve for the poor, poor Palestinians. He writes a damn book with the inflammatory title, “Palestine: Peace, not Apartheid,” equating Israel with racist South Africa—even though the Palestinians are demanding land that belongs to Israel, land Israel annexed after being attacked, land that should be for Jews and Israeli citizens because the Arabs have a zillion other places to live.

Carter tries to play both sides of the fence. He sometimes makes nice-nice to Israel, saying he doesn’t support a boycott of the country over its policies. But then he turns around and chastises Eretz Yisroel for the way she conducts a war against an enemy that’s lobbing rockets in her backyard.

Like so many liberals and misinformed do-gooders, Jimmy Carter loves to invent a moral equivalency when there isn’t one. “Both Israel and Hamas are equally wrong and share equal blame,” which is not true; and let’s harp on Israel but be really gentle with the Arabs because we don’t want to make them mad. After all, Islam, the religion of peace, blows a ton of shit up, peacefully.

My main point is: considering his failure at almost every aspect of domestic and foreign leadership, and how he was humiliated by the Ayatollah—a guy who looked like Sean Connery wearing a microwavable heat wrap on his head—Jimmy Carter has as much business telling Israel what to do about the Muslims, as Michelle Duggar has telling the Pritzkers how to raise children. Of all people, Jimmy Carter should be the last one to believe you can reason with radicals, bargain with bullies, and mollify murderers.

After all, as we speak, Jimmy Carter’s body is being invaded by cancer cells that mean him only harm. Should the president’s doctor say, “Well, it’s not right to kill these invaders; it’s your fault for having a desirable host they want to live in. But tell you what. Why don’t you sacrifice so you can live in harmony with your cancer. Let them take your pancreas, your liver, your balls and your bones, and you can live side by side. And they promise never ever ever to move into your blood. Or least not for a week or two. Whaddya say?”

I say, “Jimmy Carter, you’ve done some good in this world, so I don’t wish you prolonged suffering. Still, if you had to get the big C, couldn’t you have gotten it in your mouth?”

This has been a Rabbinical Reflection from Rabbi Sol Solomon, Temple Sons of Bitches, in Great Neck, New York.

NON-FICTION – ESSAY – HUMOROUS: Rabbi Sol Solomon’s Rabbinical Reflection #131 (8/22/2015): JIMMY CARTER

Dave’s Gone By #474 (8/2/2014): HAVING ANOTHER BALL

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Here is the 474th episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, Aug. 2, 2014. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with actor-singer George Ball. Plus: Inside Broadway, Saturday Segues (Joseph Spence, Tony Bennett), Rabbi Sol’s Rabbinical Reflection (Going Great Guns in Gaza) and the Wretched Pun of Destiny (Football).

Guests: songwriter George Ball, Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce
00:30:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – Joseph Spence
00:44:00 INSIDE BROADWAY
00:53:00 WRETCHED PUN OF DESTINY – Football
00:55:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews George Ball
02:03:00 RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #104 (Going Great Guns in Gaza)
02:10:30 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later: Another Side Knocked Out Again
02:34:00 Friends
02:41:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – Tony Bennett
03:01:00 DAVE GOES OUT

Aug. 2, 2014 Playlist: “Good Morning Mr. Walker” (00:30:30), “Yellow Bird” (00:33:00), “Rock Daniel” (00:35:30), “Goodnight Irene” (00:37:30; Joseph Spence). “A New Sun in the Sky” (“The Band Wagon” 1959 film soundtrack; 00:51:30). “Some Enchanted Evening” (00:55:00), “If I Were You” (01:05:00), “The Moon is Still Over her Shoulder” (01:14:00), “Fanette” (01:27:30), “Highway Patrolman” (01:44:30) & “Save the Last Dance for Me” (01:58:00; George Ball). “Ballad in Plain D” (02:40:30) & “Brownsville Girl” (02:23:00; Bob Dylan). “Until I Met You” (02:44:30) “Shakin’ the Blues Away” (02:47:30), “Lost in the Stars” (02:49:00), “For Once in My Life” (02:53:30) & “The Best is Yet to Come” (02:57:00; Tony Bennett). “August Winds” (03:03:00; Sting).

Dave’s Gone By Skit: RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #105 (8/31/2014): Eventful August

RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #105 (8/31/14): Eventful August

aired Aug. 30, 2014 on Dave’s Gone By. Youtube clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJUCZgwGJnI

Shalom Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon with a Rabbinical Reflection for the week of August 31st, 2014.

Well, it’s been an eventful month in World Woebegone. What should have been a nice, relaxing laze through the end of summertime – or for those of you in New Zealand, your last good shot at a snowball fight – instead has been an August fraught with war, tumult and misfortune.

Closest to my own heart, of course, is the battle raging between Israel and Palestinians in Gaza. When last we checked in together, Israel was mourning the loss of three innocent hitchhikers who took a wrong turn at Albuquerque. That was followed by Palestinians firing rockets at Israel – actually it was preceded by and followed by Palestinians firing rockets at Israel. Which led to Israel saying “enough’s enough.”

Which led to massive bombings, more rockets, a couple of psychotic Israelis killing Arab children, a few cease fires that lasted long enough for the Arabs to import more rockets, lots of dead Arab terrorists, Hamas militants and semi-innocent-semi-civilians, too many dead IDF soldiers, and a battle that President Obama has been kind enough to let Israel wage without much interference beyond the occasional “naughty-naughty.”

My feelings about the Gaza situation have been spoken so many times, I feel like a “Murder She Wrote” rerun on the Hallmark Channel. Still, I’ll say it again: tiny little Israel shaved off a sliver of itself to give the Arabs in exchange for peace. What do the Palestinians give us in return? Thousands of attempted murders by rocket attacks, punctuated by the occasional real murder, just to break the monotony. How does Hamas expect to give the Palestinians a permanent home if they’re such horrible tenants when they rent?

And to all the left-wing ignoramuses – ignorami? Ignoramians? – okay, morons, who march in Times Square and the garment district with their Arab flags and their Zionism-is-Nazism banners and their screaming about Israeli war crimes, I will say once again: when the Arabs stop terrorizing Jews – and every other culture in the Western World, we’ll stop killing Arabs back. And if they don’t like living in or near Israel, there’s plenty of Arab land in the Middle East where they can worship Islam, stone their women and cut off each other’s hands for picking their noses.

Oh, and for all those “Democracy Now” types bashing Israel for killing Arabs, guess how many Arabs were killed by Arabs in Syria? 191,000, give or take. Meanwhile, Iraq is falling apart, so we have to go back there because of militant Mohammedans, and in response, a Syrian terrorist cut off the head of an American journalist and put it on youtube to see how many likes he could get. Some say the video is a fake, but even if it is, somebody got his head handed to him.

And speaking of violence: it just wouldn’t be a summer in the American south without racial tension, would it? So a black guy shoplifts from a convenience store, roughs up the owner a little bit when he tries to resist, gets stopped by a cop for reasons that have nothing to do with the crime, starts charging at the officer – or surrendering – depending on whose story you believe, and gets a half a dozen bullets in his head for his troubles.

Are the blacks upset? You bet. The guy had no knife, no gun, no nothing. Instead of his deadliest weapon, the cop coulda reached for a taser, or his nightstick. Then again, Michael Brown coulda reached for his wallet instead of stealing those cigars. He’s lucky the store owner didn’t blow his head off before the po-po did.

Obviously, police have a trigger-finger problem, especially when it comes to foreigners or people whose skin is darker than your average manila file folder. So if this whole Ferguson, Missouri calamity leads to better policing, I’m all for it. But when I see protestors willing to believe everything bad about American cops and everything angelic and wonderful about Michael Brown, my eyebrow rises. And when I see other protestors somehow equating Israel’s retaliation against Hamas with the death of this teenager, my gorge rises. And when I see actress Penelope Cruz denouncing Israel for committing genocide, my dick rises. I can’t help it, it’s Penelope Cruz. But the bitch really needs to show more tits and less mouth. I hope she chokes on her Nescafe.

Speaking of choking, a fond farewell to Robin Williams, actor, comedian and apparently all-around good guy. He really wasn’t that funny, but he made such a constant effort to be funny that you had to give him props and marvel at his gusto. I liked him in “Mork and Mindy,” I loved him in “Awakenings,” and I’ll miss his risk-taking performances as much as his more patented standup. Yes, he suffered from depression, but if you made “Patch Adams,” you’d be depressed, too.

We also had a suicide by Nascar, with Kevin Ward, Jr., stepping out of his vehicle to confront driver Tony Stewart for sending him into a spin. Okay, here’s a math problem everyone: If you stand in front of a car going 250 miles an hour, what are the odds of getting hit by a car going 250 miles an hour? I’d say 100 percent, Alex. Maybe Kevin Ward was too angry to think straight, but he was certainly too dumb to live.

Then again, the state of our government could make anyone suicidal. The Republicans keep vowing to impeach the president for being Karl Marx, while 2016 GOP front runner Rick Perry gets indicted for being Machiavelli.

We lost a nice Jewish girl named Betty Jane Persky who grew up to be Lauren Bacall, and the month of August also gave us a 6.0 earthquake in Northern California, causing millions of dollars of damage to vineyards in Sonoma and Napa Valley. Great, just when we need to get rip-roaring drunk to forget all the crap that’s happening, God smashes the bottles.

So where will we be a month from now? Will Russia invade the Ukraine? Will September 11th come and go without ISIS offering us an anniversary gift? Will Malaysia start making airplanes out of rubber, just in case they have to bounce? Hang on, my friends, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

This has been a Rabbinical Reflection from Rabbi Sol Solomon, Temple Sons of Bitches in Great Neck, New York.

–> https://davesgoneby.net/?p=27576

Dave’s Gone By #472 (7/5/2014): TO DAVE IS THE HIGHWAY

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Here is the 472nd episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired on UNC Radio, July 5, 2014. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Featuring: Rabbi Sol Solomon chats with singer songwriter Eric Andersen and with Gene Kelly archivist Patricia Ward Kelly. Plus: Rabbi Sol’s Rabbinical Reflection on the murdered Israeli teenagers, a birthday salute to Beck and Bob Dylan: Sooner & Later (Like a Rolling Stone).

Guests: musician Eric Andersen, biographer Patricia Ward Kelly, Dave’s wife Joyce

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN w/ Joyce
00:36:00 SATURDAY SEGUE: Beck
00:59:00 Sponsors
01:04:30 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Eric Andersen
01:55:00 RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #103 (Brothers’ Keepers)
02:01:00 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later (Like a Rolling Stone)
02:27:00 GUEST: Rabbi Sol Solomon interviews Patricia Ward Kelly
03:35:00 DAVE GOES OUT

July 5, 2014 Playlist: “Girl” (00:36:00), “Heart is a Drum” (00:39:30), “Movie Theme” (00:44:00), “The New Pollution” (00:48:00) & “The Golden Age” (00:51:30; Beck). “Violets of Dawn” (01:04:30), “Beat Avenue” ({excerpt} 01:21:30), “Sheila” (01:38:00), “Dance of Love and Death” (01:47:00), “Hello Sun” (01:52:30) & “Rollin’ Home” (03:42:00; Eric Andersen). “You Can’t Relive the Past” (01:13:30; Eric Andersen & Lou Reed). “Thirsty Boots” (01:32:00), “Like a Rolling Stone” (02:02:30), “Like a Rolling Stone” ({early version}; 02:09:00) & “Like a Rolling Stone” ({live Manchester version}; 02:13:00; Bob Dylan). “Like a Rolling Stone” (02:10:30; Sebastian Cabot). “Good Morning” (02:24:00) & “Singin’ in the Rain” (02:51:30); “Singin’ in the Rain” 1952 soundtrack w/ Gene Kelly, Donald O’Connor & Gene Kelly). “The Worry Song” (03:05:30) & “You Wonderful You” (03:32:00; Gene Kelly).

*Eyal Yifrach, Gilad Shaar & Naftali Frenkel*

Dave’s Gone By #362 (9/24/2011): LEMMONY SNICKER

Click above to listen to the episode (audio only).

Here is the 362nd episode of the long-running radio show/podcast, Dave’s Gone By, which aired Sept. 24, 2011. Info: davesgoneby.com.

Host: Dave Lefkowitz
Guests: actor-musician Chris Lemmon & comedian Gallagher

Featuring: Dave chats with actor Chris Lemmon and comedian Gallagher. Plus: Dave Says Bye to R.E.M., Inside Broadway (news), and Rabbi Sol Solomon’s Rabbinical Reflection on Palestinian statehood.

00:00:01 DAVE GOES IN
00:13:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – Lemons
00:33:00 GUEST: Chris Lemmon
01:13:30 INSIDE BROADWAY (news & Dr. Selavy)
01:32:30 Weather & Sponsors
01:39:30 GUEST: Gallagher
02:26:30 BOB DYLAN – Sooner & Later
02:43:30 Rabbi Sol Solomon’s Rabbinical Reflection on Palestinian statehood
02:51:00 Friends
02:59:00 SATURDAY SEGUE – R.E.M.
03:28:00 DAVE GOES OUT

Sept. 24, 2011 Playlist: “Lemon” (00:13:00; U2), “Baby Lemonade” (Syd Barrett; 00:20:00); “The Lemon Song” (00:24:00; Led Zeppelin); “Lemon Tree” (Peter, Paul & Mary; 00:30:00), “A Twist of Lemmon” (excerpt, Chris Lemmon; 01:06:00); “Jingle” (01:24:00), “Bankrupt Blues” (01:24:30), “Future for Sale” (01:26:00), “Requiem” (01:27:00) & “Life on the Inside” (01:29:00; Dr. Selavy’s Magic Theater, 1972 off-Bway cast), Gallagher youtube clips (01:39:30 & 02:19:30; Gallagher); “Clean Cut Kid” (02:27:00), “Country Pie” (02:31:00), “Subterranean Homesick Blues” (02:32:30), “Neighborhood Bully” (02:35:00; Bob Dylan); “Fall on Me” (02:47:30), “Mr. Richards” (02:59:00), “Disturbance at the Heron House” (03:03:00), “Near Wild Heaven” (03:06:30), “Nightswimming” (03:17:00), “Me in Honey” (03:21:00), “I Am Superman” (03:25:30) “It’s the End of the World as We Know it” (03:32:00; R.E.M.).

Dave’s Gone By Skit: RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #24 (9/24/2011): Statehood?

click above to listen (audio file)

RABBI SOL SOLOMON’S RABBINICAL REFLECTION #24 (9/24/2011): Statehood?

aired Sept. 24, 2011 on Dave’s Gone By. Youtube Clip: https://youtu.be/TLOkZL4hvOY

Shalom, Dammit! This is Rabbi Sol Solomon, with a Rabbinical Reflection for the week of September 25th, 2011.

So the Palestinians want a state. Whoopdeefreakin’-doo. All these years of fighting Israel, blowing up restaurants in Israel, sabotaging peace talks with Israel – and all they wanted all along was to BE Israel. Of course, they have to have THEIR Israel inside the current Israel, which is why Obama and Bibi Netanyahu are telling them where they can stick their kebabs.

I have nothing against the Palestinians having a state of their own. Besides their usual state of confusion. They can have a homeland in Jordan, they can have one in Saudi Arabia. Even Turkey can throw `em a few kilometers. Why does it have to be in Israel? Israel is 10,000 square miles; the rest of the middle east is 8.6 million square miles. It’s like Walmart coming to town and saying, “We could build our superstore in that huge abandoned parking lot, but we’d rather squeeze it into your kitchen.”

What people forget is that in the 1920s, when England was controlling Palestine, the Arabs were offered half of it. They turned it down because they didn’t want to share it with Jews. In 1947, they turned down a two-state solution for the same reason. A year later, Israel became a nation, the Arabs attacked, and their turbans have been soaked in blood ever since.

So suddenly, they turn to the United Nations – which has been sucking the shmeckel of the Arabs for six decades – and the Palestinians say, “Declare us a state.” They don’t say where, they don’t say how. If there’s Jews on it, that’s where they want to be.

In the 63 years since Israel came to be, what have the Arabs done to prove that they can co-exist side by side with Jews? Or any living thing, for that matter? 9/11, Lockerbie, bombings in Gaza, the Yom Kippur War, the Munich Olympics, the London subways. What a record of accomplishment!

So here’s my idea for the Palestinians – they should all go to the zoo. No, really. Bring them to the biggest zoo in Lebanon with lots of land and food and vegetation. Then partition the zoo so that the Arabs have half of it and the lions and tigers and bears have the other half. Just make sure to put up signs around the zoo that say: “Caution! Wild and Vicious Animals.” It’s only fair to warn the lions, tigers and bears.

This has been a Rabbinical Reflection from Rabbi Sol Solomon, Temple Sons of Bitches. Shana Tovah!

—> https://davesgoneby.net/?p=30007