Tag: satire

A holiday ditty based on the true story of a woman who disposed of her unwanted infant in a not-so-Christmassy way.

Song aired Dec. 8, 2003, as part of the “Dave’s Gone By” radio program hosted by Dave Lefkowitz.

Please Note: Segments extracted from “Dave’s Gone By” may have music and other elements removed for timing and media re-posting considerations. For the full show with all elements, please visit the audio of the complete original broadcast: Full Episode.

All content (c)2003 TotalTheater Productions.

More information on Dave’s Gone By: http://www.davesgoneby.com

(c)2003 David Lefkowitz. 

IT’S A STIFF

Lyrics: David Lefkowitz. Music: Jule Styne’s “Let it Snow”)

Oh, the weather outside is frozen, 

so a Brooklyn church was chosen

All bundled in a blanket and a rag

There’s a small baby corpse in a bag.

The mother didn’t want to have her

So now she’s a blue cadaver

And it stinks if you take a whiff

It’s a stiff, it’s a stiff, it’s a stiff.

All the congregants in the church

They try to sympathize with the mother

`cause maybe in nine more months,

She’ll make a lifeless brother.

`Cause she didn’t really have an option

`cept birth control, abortion or adoption

When you’re stuck with a useless tot,

Let it rot, let it rot, let it rot.

Well, it’s kinda hard feeling merry

When you’ve got a bag of bones to bury

There’s very little skin inside;

Mummified, mummified, mummified.

They’ll measure her casket size

While a sermon’s being written

And makeup will soon disguise

Fingers all black and frostbitten. (crack!)

Now the temperature may be frigid

Enough to make a newborn rigid

Too late to save the infant’s soul.

Dig a hole, dig a hole, dig a hole.

It was just the baby’s time to die.

Wonder why, wonder why, wonder why.